Whenever I’m working with a couple that is arguing and unable to listen to each other, I ask my clients this question – Would you rather feel right or feel better? I think if we are honest, most of us would rather feel right than feel better, when we become entrenched in an argument and want to prove our point.
But in your effort to prove yourself right, you are usually single mindedly focused and your energy is contracted, which means you are no longer listening or creating a space for a new way of conceptualizing something, which is how solutions are born.
So why do we need to be right? It feels good! But that's a temporary gain. When you are determined to be right, there will be always be a cost because you will be engaged in a mental battle that disconnects you from the love and wisdom in your heart. You may win the battle but lose your sense of peace and connection to a person you care about. Which one do you value more?
If you are experiencing conflict and considering couples counseling, I would be honored to work with and help you find more peace in your relationship. You can click on my Services page to learn more and if you want to keep reading more posts, click on my Blog.
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I’ve always loved the word Delight! To me it means “of the light” and with all the darkness and fear in the world today, I wanted to create a place where we can gather together, restore our connection to the light and help one another to Delight The World with love, kindness, gentleness, beauty, compassion and grace. —Amy Rose, LCSW